What You Need, What You Deserve
by DaHaloChick
Summary: Sabaku no Gaara and Yoiza Shukai both have very interesting theories on what the other needs and deserves. Still, such things do not simply come to you one must fight for them...GaaraOC


_**What You Need, What You Deserve**_

_By DaHaloChick_

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**AUTHORS NOTE:** Naruto belongs to all its creators and distributors, yadda yadda yadda. We all know I don't own it! However, Yoiza Shukai is mine. I like her

Anyway, I knew from the way Yoiza felt as I wrote her that she would feel the way many OCs do about Gaara, 'he's not a monster, he's really a good guy, etc. etc. etc.'. Still, I wanted to be truthful to her as a character while still giving what I felt was an uncommon twist to that formula. I like to think I succeeded D.

Feel free to comment and review, its always helpful to hear feedback! Enjoy!

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"I know what you need."

Gaara stopped in the doorway, turning his head toward Yoiza with an annoyed look. "Excuse me?"

She swallowed, a determined look bleeding into her sea-colored eyes. "I know what you need, Gaara. I know now what it is you're missing that makes you this way."

His eyes narrowed. "What do you mean, 'this way'?"

"Cold," she said plainly. "Stone-faced, Acting like you don't feel, like you don't _care_ about anything or anybody, when you and I both know that's not true." She dared to take a step closer to him. "I know what you need."

He chuckled, only because he would not give her the satisfaction of the laugh he was stifling. "You know nothing." He turned to her fully. "You don't know me or anything about me. I don't need anything; I am Kazekage. If I want something, I get it. It's that simple." He glared at her. "I know what _you_ need. A dose of reality."

Yoiza gasped when he appeared right in front of her in a split second. "You think because you're clever, because you are an artist, a master at interpreting underlying truths in what you see, that you can know me just by watching me or listening to me. Well, listen to this, because I will _not_ say it again." He gave her a deadly look. "You can't tell me what I feel or do not feel. I feel very little, and what I _do_ feel is none of your damned business. I am a demon; I can be your worst nightmare if I wish to be." He snarled. "You need a dose of reality, Yoiza, because you're coming dangerously close to having me kill you. I need _nothing_."

She struggled to regain her composure, realizing she hadn't seen him like this in years. He had changed so much, but now he was closing her off, trying to keep her from interpreting anything more about him, she was sure. "You won't hurt me, Gaara. I know you wouldn't. Because the truth of the matter is, _I_ have what you need."

He resisted the urge to strike her, instead raising an eyebrow. "Oh, really? And what would that be?"

She bit her lip in last minute consideration before wrapping her arms around him. "You need someone who isn't afraid of you."

He stiffened. He knew she was brave, outright foolish at times. She had spoken so many dangerous words to him over the years, but never once had she touched him. "You need someone who doesn't think you're this horrific demon you make yourself out to be. You need someone who can see you for who you really are rather than what others assume you to be." She took in a breath. "I _am_ that person." She looked up at him. His head was positioned straight forward, matching the stiffness of the rest of his body. He looked down slightly at her, his eyes meeting her steady and resolved look.

"You are a fearsome fighter, Gaara, but you as a person, as a man, are not someone to fear. You have the love and respect of the people of Sunagakure, _your_ people, and of your brother and sister as well." She paused slightly, unsure of how to approach her next point without angering him. "When we first met, when you were just a Chuunin, you were like a stone wall, hiding every single thing about you from the world. Now, after so many years, you're…different. Everyone sees it, Gaara. Kankuro and Temari are no longer afraid of you; they feel comfortable enough now to show you the affection they feel for you as their younger brother."

She relaxed her grip, fairly confident he would at least let her finish speaking. "I have seen you open up. We all have. You're so used to seeing yourself as this ugly monster; you don't even realize that, if you ever were that monster, you're most certainly not anymore." She tried to keep her voice low, even though she felt the need to scream over the sound of her pounding heart. "When I look at you, I see a man who is a great leader, a protector, a warrior, a _friend_." She tried to look as serious as possible. "I see a man who has had pain in his past, and for whatever reason feels he is unable to let go of it." She smirked to herself. "Maybe that's what you _really_ need. To let go."

Gaara let out a breath. To let go. That's what she felt he needed? How odd, he thought as he warred with the urge to hold her to him, that all he wanted to do at the moment was to hold on. _To her._

But he couldn't. Not because he couldn't bring himself to touch her, but because she was walking away from him, and he couldn't bring himself to follow her.

It was better this way, he decided. What _she_ needed was to realize that he, Sabaku no Gaara, the Kazekage of Sunagakure, could never be loved by someone like her.

His fingers curled into fists, his voice flowing in a pained tone. "You will…never understand…" he spoke to nothingness. "A life like mine…it isn't what you deserve."

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_What I deserve…_

Despite her incessant urge to grab Gaara and shake him furiously, Yoiza forced herself to keep on walking. He probably didn't even know that she'd overheard him, anyways.

_That_ was how he felt? That she didn't _deserve_ his kind of life?

When had he ever once _cared_? After so many years of sticking by his side and getting treated like shit for it, he was going to take this particular moment in time to begin caring about what kind of life she deserved?

_What kind of _crap_ is that!!_

She had felt joy, excitement, heartbreak, so many things in the presence of Gaara since they had first met, but she had never felt anger at him. Now, she was maddeningly pissed off. After all she had done, all of the harsh words and dirty looks she'd taken from him, he was going to use some half-assed excuse like _that_ to justify ignoring her words of advice?

And what, she thought briefly, did a kind of life she deserved have to do with what she felt he needed? It had nothing to do with the conversation they had been having. How had her words made him think of what she deserved?

_I am _so_ fed up with sitting and wondering what his cryptic ass is really trying to say!_ Although she was normally a fairly peaceful woman, Yoiza Shukai had suddenly jumped into a set of emotions she rarely allowed herself to feel.

She turned on her heel, stalking back to where she had come from. Her wavy brown hair swooshed angrily behind her, almost electrified with her frustration. She burst back into the room she'd been in. Gaara was still there, and he jumped up, startled.

"What in the _hell_ did you mean by saying that I don't _deserve_ a life like yours?" He fought the urge to step back, her aqua eyes burning. "What does that have to do with what I think you need, or what you think I need? What in the HELL is your problem, Gaara!"

"I meant it exactly the way it sounded," he replied, hardening his gaze. "And it had _everything_ to do with it. I told you, you need a reality check. You've wasted your entire time training a ninja following me around, befriending my siblings so I wouldn't kick you out of my presence. You've felt the need to _pine_ after me like some foolish little schoolgirl, thinking you have these feelings for me that you would never be able to comprehend, even if you did." It was her turn to be shocked. "You don't love me, Yoiza, because even after all of these years, _you don't know me_."

Yoiza was frozen. Her mind was at a complete standstill. "And besides, like I said, somebody like you doesn't deserve the type of life I lead. Even if you did lo—"

"I DO love you, Gaara!" he clammed up immediately. She gasped despite herself, realizing she had never spoken those words to him before. "You can't _possibly_ tell me if I love you or not because you don't know what love is yet! All your life you've worked to deny yourself it because you feel you don't deserve it!"

"I know your life is hard, Gaara, I'm no fool. I've seen what you've been through," she said, her body feeling as if it were on fire. "Let me tell you something, Gaara. You may not think I deserve that type of life, and maybe I don't, but let me tell you what I _do_ deserve." She stomped towards him, pointing a finger in his face.

"I deserve the love that I have felt for you all these years. I've worked my ever-loving ass off to stay in your good graces like some sort of _idiot_ and you've treated me like shit the entire time!" She couldn't stop her words, having wanted to blow at him like this for the longest time. "You don't know what loves is, so maybe you couldn't give it to me, and that's fine, I don't _care_ at this point, but I deserve some fucking respect!" Gaara blanched at hearing such coarse language escape the tiny girl's lips. "I have stayed truthful and loyal to you regardless of how you've treated me, and I'll tell you something else," she fumed, "What I _don't_ deserve, is your bullshit."

She did her best to ignore the tears beginning to make trails down her cheeks. "I've tried so _hard_ to be by your side, and you've done everything in your power to push me away," her voice was silent and distant. "Well you know what, _Kazekage_? You've got your wish." And with that, she turned and left the room. This time, Gaara was fairly sure she wouldn't be coming back.

Yoiza knew she couldn't stop the tears, but she still tried her best to not make any noise. She could leave the house, head down, and nobody would be the wiser that she had finally had enough. Just as she was about to turn into the main hall to leave, she felt a crawling feeling all over her skin.

_Sand_. There were trails of sand, wrapping themselves around her arms and legs, pulling her away from the door and further into the house.

Her blood ran cold. _He's going to kill me_. That had been a possible outcome of talking to him like that the whole time, yet she hadn't really thought of it. _Well, if he wants to hurt me, I'll fight._

Suddenly, the sand pinned her against a wall. She grunted, not expecting the impact. Her pain was quickly replaced with fear and confusion as a wave of heat hit her.

She looked forward and realized Gaara was now in front of her. _Right_ in front of her. Practically pressed up against her. She opened her mouth to make a threat about him trying to kill her, but she lost all thought when he slammed his lips against hers.

She tried to push him off of her, but the sand kept her pinned. When he pulled away, she glared at him fiercely. "I swear to you Gaara, if you—" but her sentence was never finished.

Their lips met again, but this time, it was like kissing a different person. His lips were gentle, soft, and the kiss was filled with so much that she would have fallen to her knees if the sand had not had her by the waist.

Slowly, the sand dissipated from her arms, and when it did, her fingers instinctively entangled themselves in Gaara's hair. The touch earned a small noise from the Sand ninja, and he replaced the sand around her waist with his arms.

It seemed like an eternity to Yoiza before he finally pulled away, gently ending the kiss with great reluctance. He rested his forehead against hers, his piercing eyes holding her gaze. "Damn you," he said, his voice gruff. "Damn you Yoiza, for making me feel this way…"

That was all he had to say. His stare, his words, while anyone else (perhaps save for his siblings) would have taken them at face value, Yoiza knew him all to well. He was not just giving her a look, or sharing words with her. He was making a confession.

She buried her face in his neck and gripped on to him, afraid to let him go, as if doing so would make it all so _unreal_ that it would unravel. Her body shook as she felt every pain and every joy she had shared with him over the years. Finally, it had all culminated in the sweetest of endings.

He placed a gentle kiss to her temple, before whispering word into her ear that Yoiza would have never believed would come from him.

"You do not deserve the life I have, Yoiza, but I will give you one that you _do_ deserve."

And that was what she _truly_ needed.

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Review, please! Thanks for reading!


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